When I was pregnant, it seemed like the responses were pretty unanimous.
"There's nothing like motherhood."
"There's no way to describe the love you have for your child."
"You'll never have a hot meal again!"
"You're going to be so tired!"
"Being a mother will change your life."
Those seemed to be the main ones. I often thought to myself; "How cliche. I've heard this a million times."
What they didn't do, was specify the "beyond" part of those claims. Nobody told me that carrying her in my own body and feeling her move would make me feel so empowered. That being kicked by your own offspring would actually make you smile (for those few months, anyway). That listening to her heartbeat on my doppler every. single. night. would become a requirement...second nature...and most of all, her heartbeat would become my comfort. That the moment she was born, my breath would be taken away (quite literally), and my heart would now be sitting on my chest when they placed her on me. That every day, I'd be so in awe, that it brings me to tears. That I'd spend countless hours staring at her, even when she's doing absolutely nothing.
Being a mother changed my life, for sure. I didn't know exactly how deep that old sentiment really went. I will spend the rest of my days with an overflowing heart. I'll worry, I'll discipline, I'll love deeper than I could have ever imagined, and I'll protect her at all costs...and although I am using the "mother" term here, I can assure you that good fathers like my husband feel the exact same way.
I love this hectic life; every minute of it. It is a challenge, but it is a greater blessing. Once you're a mom, you're always a mom. Being a mother has taught me so many things. It has made me feel emotions that I knew existed, but still had no idea how deeply they ran. My outlook on the entire world has changed. I can't even watch the news anymore without feeling a million types of worry and sadness.
So, with all of this being said, is it really so bad after all if my meals are lukewarm and my nights are short? Not at all. If I could trade this love and this life for an endless supply of hot meals and sleep, would I? Of course not. Would you?
